Thursday, January 15, 2009

...to all the songs I've loved before

Revelation is kinda like having an epiphany, except for the fact that you had no role in coming to know and understand it, it was just brought before you.

I had a revelation today. I played no role in its development, it was suddenly just there. My heart is breaking, daily. There's so much joy in the world, in worship, in friendship, in love. But you can strip joy out of your world, and when that is done - what remains? What does one fill it with?

My answer is trust. Unrelenting trust. That's all that I've got right now. I ran through a dark time in my life where I didn't have much trust, nor the aforementioned bringers of joy, and I was without light. But after a talk with one of my best friends this afternoon, I realized what I have. I have trust. I trust in love, in marriage, in friends, in God (above all else). I'm a bit optimistic, a bit unrealistic, a bit hopeless.

But why not, I ask you? What are you living for when the things you love are gone? Hope is a precious thing. When our country is going through such uncertainty, when people are subdued on anti-depressants, alcohol, and weed that they can't function, when the dollar isn't worth jack, where is your hope? Without hope, what are you living for?

My hope is in tomorrow, in the future, in God, and in love. Love is kinda like chocolate cake. Once you've had a taste (unless you're a diabetic), you just want more. I've gotta admit, I want to know love again. In time, I trust that God will show me love in this life.

Trust.

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